I was hire at a company in late 2011. Fast forward to 2015, I received a promotion from my job. I was very excited about the new position because I had prayed to God for an increase. The new position was in another department that had several growth opportunities. When I moved to the new position, I was very grateful to God because I knew He opened the door for it and out of gratitude, I worked my butt off.

A couple years later, I was promoted to another position. The same work ethic was applied, and I was promoted again a couple years later. There were changes made at the company that heavily increased my workload due to the required support being taken away. I wasn’t the only one feeling the pain. Several others complained of the new challenges. I shifted from feeling fulfilled and challenged to being overwhelmed and anxious.

Feeling anxious is not new for me. I’ve dealt with anxiety from my childhood, so I used my go-to coping mechanisms to assist. One of the main coping mechanisms I use is spending time with God, reading the word, and going to church.

Within a 5-year span, I stopped going to church due to an incident that caused me and others a lot of pain. Due to the church incident, I distanced myself from God as well. I still spoke to Him daily and prayed but I wasn’t consistent in reading the bible.

As expected, my anxiety grew, because I wasn’t spending enough time with God. I prayed to God and asked him to help me get through the day and talked to Him throughout the day to get by. He helped me but my anxiety and depression continued to grow because I was not consistent.

I received another promotion, and shortly afterwards, more responsibility was added to my plate. The new responsibility was very stressful on top on what I was already carrying. I pushed through, working on fumes and completely depleted myself to the point where I was having panic attacks at work. In short, my new workload was the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Most would ask, why would you take the promotion knowing what was already on your plate and my answer to them would be people pleasing, ignoring my own needs, attempting to prove my worth, and chasing money. Also, I had been doing the job for years at this point, thought I could handle it, and never expected the huge responsibility that was being added with limited support. Looking back, I was naive.

Every morning that I spent with God and reading the word, I was refilled and was able to handle the day without tears in my eyes. Every day that I didn’t, I cried and/or held back tears while working, feeling anxious and depressed and that’s not the half of it I had several other issues as well. I made the decision to take a leave to focus on my mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health because I was in a horrible place.

Taking a step back was a huge help. It allowed me to see where I went wrong and what changes I needed to make for my overall health.

Here are some takeaways:

1. Time with God is sacred. Prioritize it.
2. There is no need to prove myself to the world. I am already accepted by Christ.
3. Develop a peace barrier. Develop a level of peace that cannot be penetrated by anything and whenever something threatens that peace step away and evaluate it to determine how you can handle it without decreasing your peace or eliminating it. Whether it’s taking a break before doing it, altering your input, or simply saying no. There’s only one you. Preserve yourself.
4. While money is important, it cannot make you happy. Things perish and they cannot fulfill like Christ can. This was an important one for me because I grew up without money, so I was skeptical when people said this but it’s very true!
5. Rationally evaluate all areas of your life often to see if anything needs to be added or removed and if something is draining you it may need to be removed. I’m aware that if it’s a job you may need to push through and stay in this economy but keep your options open and never stop pushing towards a better future.
6. Build a life you love. You exist outside of work. Have other hobbies or interests in your life that fill you and stay consistent with them but never substitute them for number 1.

If you are currently feeling burned out and hopeless, I know how that feels and I am sorry that you feel that way. If you feel prayer would be helpful, please email me your prayer request.

The Anchored Woman